One of the first things parents teach their children is to say ‘thank you’.

-“What do you say to Grandma?”
-“Thank you for the Hot Wheels, Grandma,” and little Jason dutifully plants a kiss on her cheek.
-“You’re welcome, honey.”

It is fitting and proper for parents to teach gratitude. While generosity is the initiation of a relationship; gratitude is the response to that relationship. Both generosity and gratitude are human virtues that are very appealing and quite necessary for a civilized society. When parents finally see that little Jason thanks Grandma without being told, they are delighted. Appreciation for Grandma’s generosity takes root in his being and is expressed with gratitude. Someone once poignantly remarked that “gratitude is the memory of the heart.”

Once again we approach that now-controversial holiday known as Thanksgiving, and we could ask ourselves “What of the memory of the heart of our nation?” Wikipedia reports Thanksgiving is “…historically a religious observation to give thanks to God, but is now considered a secular holiday.” ‘Secular holiday’ is an oxymoron. There is no such notion because the very word ‘holiday’ comes from the Old English words “Holy Day”. Hence, there can be no Secular Holy Day because by definition a ‘holy’ day is in reference to God.

Which brings us back to the ‘memory of our heart’. Collectively speaking, have Americans forgotten God’s generosity and have we forsaken our heritage in expressing our gratitude to God? If America insists on Thanksgiving being a ‘Secular Holy Day’ and if we have Collective Alzheimer’s the memory of the heart will fade. Being deceived into some illusory self-sufficiency is worse than a bratty, ungrateful child. Grandma probably won’t buy little Jason any more Hot Wheels next year! Instead he’ll get an itchy knitted sweater. Make no mistake about it: the Pilgrims knew quite well their survival was due in large measure to the Indians who assisted them, and while they did thank the Indians and shared their feast with them, their gratitude was directed to God.

The Pilgrims families have a similarity to our own families of the 21st century. Every family has its own ‘holy days’, for example, when they celebrate a child’s birthday and a couple’s wedding anniversary. Celebrating their first, a tenth, then a 25th Silver Anniversary is a joyous occasion. Likewise, a child’s First Birthday, Sweet Sixteen, and a more significant 21st birthday. This is a time to remember who they are; where they’ve been; and more importantly where they are going; and they are marked year after year after year – lending a certain rhythm of life for the individual child, the couple, and the family. It is part of their memory which in turn forms their identity as a family. And since the family is considered the basic cell of society – the smallest ‘culture’ – it is fitting to remind ourselves that “the future of humanity passes by way of the family.” (www.vatican.va/holy_father/john_paul_ii/)

What then of the ‘memory of the heart’ of American families? While teaching little Jason to thank Grandma, do we also teach our children to say ‘thank you’ to God for His Providential blessings upon our country celebrated as such on that First Thanksgiving of 1621? Praying together as a family – as a colony – as a nation – penetrates the innermost depths of children’s hearts. It leaves an impression on their soul that will not be erased regardless of whatever misfortune befalls them or whatever successes they may enjoy.

I believe we are a generous and grateful nation, but gratitude needs to be expressed for it confirms and affirms the relationship between the giver and the receiver – between God and our nation. We have not lost our trust and belief in God – it’s only the media who would like to us to think we have. Hence Wikipedia is sadly mistaken. The memory of our heart resides in the heart of the family. Pray, America! What happens within the four walls of our homes portends America’s future and continued greatness.